When I started as an actor, a very dear uncle of mine gave me an invaluable piece of advise. He said, “keep looking and studying people around you in your day to day life, it’ll help you whilst playing characters in your movies”. And I have tried to do that as much as possible without seeming like a stalker! Whether it’s while working out at the gym, or while I am stuck in a traffic jam, while walking around the park with my wife, or while partying with my friends at a nightclub. And I can’t help but notice the one common factor in all these situations, SEX, or the thought of it!
You must be wondering what is so sexy about being stuck in traffic and sweating it out in the gym? Or walking in the park with your own wife!!! Allow me to explain.
While I am pounding the weights at my neighborhood gym, 60 % or more of the people there are looking at someone or the other thinking how he or she would be in bed! How to approach them causally without looking like a pile on and ask for his/her number. They might be doing squats with 100 pounders but they are not necessarily concerned about their own glutes. They are looking at the hot number in tiny black shorts and sweaty, body hugging t-shirt and wondering if she’s noticing his perfect form. And please do notice the last repetition of this squatter while you are at your gym the next time. It will be the longest and loudest grunt of all time! Very like the medieval ages, wherein the hunter would let out a loud cry before setting upon his prey.
Am sure you are wondering what could be sexy about being stuck in traffic? Let me tell you. In the big, congested city of Mumbai, practically everyone spends 1/3rd of their lives on the road! And I can’t help but notice how different people behave differently in the same situation.
Last week, out of the blue, it started pouring cats and dogs and as is wont in the marvellous metropolis of Mumbai, traffic got clogged within the hour! I was stuck at the busy cross section of Juhu where a middle aged couple seemed to be in the ‘moment’ looking deeply into each others eyes probably thinking of their youth when they used to get much more action, a young model type, looking like he had just got off a train from Meerut, was talking loudly into his Blackberry and I could actually hear the address of Anita who was setting up for the night, to a very sweet 21 year old girl in a rickshaw next to my car was sitting there just smiling with an expression of ‘just did it’. Won’t talk much about the girl on the bike just in front of me who was wearing such low rise jeans that it was embarrassing.
And then of course you are intrigued about what could be sexy about walking in the park with your OWN wife! It might not be sexy for us but it surely is sexy for the people sitting around watching the 2 of us walking around hand in hand. In all humility, I have always felt that all the ladies in the park would have loved to walk down the garden path with me! So while some of them are lusting for me, some of them are thinking “what if”! And while I am wondering about these beautiful yet impossible possibilities, my dear wife slaps me hard on my posterior and tells me to hurry up and walk faster. Amazingly, she knows what I am thinking and is quick to point out that only she knows what it is to be living with me! While they might be ‘dreaming’ of you right now, they don’t know that it is actually a ‘nightmare’! I have quickly been brought down to planet earth and continue my walk like a dutiful husband.
And finally the scariest place, THE NIGHTCLUB! This is the place where the action (read SEX) actually happens. And I call this scary because as evolved as I might be, I can see the fabric of Indian society being ripped to shreds at these hotspots of decadent living. While I must admit that 20% of the people are actually there to dance and make merry, most of them are drunk beyond themselves and falling on anybody who would give them a shoulder. At the risk of sounding like a prude, it is appalling to see how all it takes to start a conversation is a cigarette or a promise of the other white stuff that has become a rage amongst these party animals. It is sad that these young girls don’t realize that they are throwing their youth away for an addiction, which starts as fun but ends up as a life threatening one. While I have nothing against experimenting, one must know when to stop. Sex in this case is a sad by-product.
Anyway, gotta go now. As a parting word, remember we belong to the land of the Kamasutra, so let sex be a celebration, not a price that you have to pay.
Credits: Times of India